We have been hearing this saying since childhood that couples are made in heaven but they have to be maintained on earth. There are many truths related to our life which need to be accepted and a proper balance is needed in married life. The most important thing in a husband-wife relationship is to love each other. If you love your partner’s inner beauty without bothering about her outer looks, then your relationship will last for seven lives. Your relationship will become an ideal relationship only when you love your partner without any selfishness. Husband and wife should always respect each other’s desires.

Patience is necessary to maintain a relationship

Tolerance is very important for maintaining a good relationship. Like every husband and wife, we also have petty fights. Not only husband and wife, but every relationship in this world is decided by God for us. We humans are just puppets in His hands. This principle of rebirth continues in the form of a cycle with our relationships, connections etc. Someone is a friend, someone is an enemy, someone is a lover. Someone is a husband, someone is a wife. Someone is a mother or father, someone is a brother or sister. Relationships may be formed by chance, but both the husband and wife have to make a lot of efforts to maintain them. I feel that there should not be any kind of secrecy in married life. If husband and wife share everything of their heart with each other like good friends, then the sweetness of the relationship remains.

Who initiated the marriage?

Aryans or Vedic Rishis were the first to introduce social systems on earth to civilize humans and tie people into a civilized society. Rishis challenged the bestial system in later times and considering it as bestial relationship, made new marriage rules. There is a reference of Rishi Swetaketu in Vedic literature that he established the marriage system to protect dignity and from then on the family system started. If there is no marriage, then there is no family. The practice of marriage was started by Vedic Rishis in ancient times itself. Living life only after marriage is a sign of being civilized. Marriage ceremony is the ‘Trayodash Sanskar’ in Hindu religious rituals. Postgraduate life is the time of marriage, that is, after studying, one has to get married and enter the householder’s stage. ‘Brahma Vivaah’ is considered one of the 16 rituals of Hindus. Only husband and wife together form a family.  Only a strong family can form a clan and this is how the social structure develops, like a tree flourishes only when its roots are firmly planted in the ground. That tree becomes hollow if there is separation within it and gets uprooted in the storms of life. 7 rounds and 7 vows are prevalent in Hinduism. Probably that is why this belief has come into vogue that the relationship of husband and wife lasts for 7 births, so do they get separated in the 8th birth? Or were they in a relationship with someone else before this first birth or is this the 7th birth for both of them?

There are many people who do not marry in a proper Vedic Hindu way but marry in some other arbitrary way. They do not even care about the Muhurta, time, Ashtakoot matching, Mangaldosha etc. Its bad consequences are also visible automatically. Actually, marriage in Hinduism is not only a sanskar but it is a completely scientific method which ensures the future life of a person and which gives a right condition and direction to his future. In Hinduism, marriage is not a contract or agreement, rather it is a spiritual relationship which is decided after careful thinking and knowing the destiny and present on the basis of astrology. There is no transaction of any kind in this marriage.

What does the relationship between Shiva and Parvati teach us?

Lord Shiva loved his wife Sati so much that he could not live without her even for a moment. Similarly, Mata Sati was so full of love for her husband Shiva that she could not bear his insult in her father’s yagya and committed suicide. But it was this love that reunited Sati with Shiva in her next birth. She was born as Parvati and eventually she got all the memories of her previous birth. Lord Shiva, who was antaryaami, knew everything.Similarly, if your wife or husband has been your partner in your previous birth, then definitely you will have a different kind of love and respect for him or her and he or she will have a different kind of love and respect for you, which will be understood only after looking deeply. Take some time out from this hectic life and look into the eyes of your wife or husband.

There are 4 types of minds inside our mind – one conscious mind, second unconscious mind, third subconscious mind, fourth collective mind. The subconscious mind is called the cosmic mind in which the memories and accumulated karmas of all our previous and future births are stored. When we meet a person who was our partner in our previous birth, we get connected to his mind as soon as we come in contact with him or when his and our aura collide with each other, then we feel something good and we are naturally filled with devotion and loving feelings towards each other. Feelings of kindness, love, compassion and a desire to talk to that person arise in our mind. Here it is important to keep in mind which feelings are arising within you. It may be that there is attraction only due to physical beauty. Hindu marriage is a relationship of many births between husband and wife which cannot be broken under any circumstances. By taking 7 rounds of fire and considering the Pole Star as a witness, two bodies, minds and souls get tied in a sacred bond.  In Hindu marriage, more importance is given to the spiritual relationship between husband and wife than the physical relationship and this relationship is established by religious marriage and keeping in mind the vows and rounds of that marriage and by gaining faith. For a person who has not studied religion, spirituality and philosophy in his childhood, marriage is just a sacrament.

Importance of lust in married life?

Lust has a very trivial and secondary place in married life, the main purpose is to create that great power arising from the union of two souls, which can prove helpful in the development of the worldly and spiritual life of both. The Shruti says – the couple who follow the vow of immense love by coordinating two bodies, two minds and intellects, two hearts, two souls and two spirits, follow the ideal of love of Uma-Maheshwar, this is the form of marriage.