Whatever we do in life, we do it to find happiness, but unfortunately being happy seems to be a very difficult task. We think that to be happy there should be certain conditions, only then we can be happy. But it is not so. Every person has some habits that can make him feel happy in himself. When we were children, we were happy by default. The source of happiness is within us, we can make it a living experience forever.
I also have a habit that always makes me feel happy. That is not to compare myself with others. In my childhood, when I used to insist on buying something after seeing it from others, my parents used to teach me that not everyone can have everything. That is why I have now developed this habit that I have learned to be happy with whatever I have. When I see others being sad, I think that this habit of mine is no less than a gift for me.
We always feel that our own qualities are less in comparison to the qualities of others. We feel jealous of the other person or his successes under the influence of the other person and many people change this habit considering it as their weakness. People always keep comparing themselves with others. This process is not from today but has been going on for centuries. People think that if others have something then you should also have it. If someone else’s house is big then you should also have a big house. But is this comparison pleasant? If you are getting inspiration from any comparison then it can be right. But if you look at this comparison in a wrong way then you will always consider yourself less and smaller than others. This increases negativity in your mind. According to an old saying, “Be sad at the happiness of others instead of being sad at your own sorrow.” In such a situation, your achievements always seem less than others and that is why you start considering yourself inferior.
I have a very big circle of friends, but I consider myself my best friend. No one can be a better friend than yourself because you know what is right and what is wrong for you. When you compare yourself with yourself, you never get disappointed and it also inspires you to become better than before. That is why you should spend some time with yourself. Only then will you know how good a person you are.
Every person has a desire to do something or the other. But if the curiosity in the mind is given dimension, then one day the person can achieve something. I am eager to bring about a change in my society. The world is developing but Indian society is still stuck in bad customs. Many such evils have taken birth in the society, which if not resolved in time, will leave a big stain on the nation. For this, people of every section of the society need to come forward.
There should be change in society, but the kind of change that is happening is worrisome. It is said that change is life. If there is no change in the country, society and the surrounding environment, then a person will get bored very soon. It is not possible to eat the same thing every day, no matter how delicious it is. Even a person who wears the same colour and shape of clothes all the time is looked at with strange eyes. Change can be good as well as bad. I experienced how the environment has changed in the gap of one generation, when I met a close friend of mine a few days ago. He has a small business. Two daughters, a son; wife and father. His mother had died a few years ago. After that, keeping in mind the future of his children, he left his village and came to Delhi. He bought a big house in the village and a three-room flat in Delhi. His elder daughter is doing MA and the second one is doing BA. He was worried about the marriage of his elder daughter. Everywhere the car would get stuck on questions like how much cash, how much goods and what kind of hospitality would be given to the wedding procession. He also wanted my help in finding a good family where the matter could be settled in less money.
During the conversation, we started discussing the changes taking place in society. Today, wherever he talks about his daughter’s marriage, it is said that at least two lakhs in cash, one lakh worth of goods and one-and-a-half lakhs should be spent on the hospitality of the wedding procession. That means five lakhs rupees are required for getting a daughter married. He was worried about this arrangement. He had two-two and a half lakhs rupees; but what could be done with that amount? His hair was flying in this worry. He was cursing this change taking place in society.
My mind started spinning. Are the changes in society taking place only in the wrong direction?
I looked at my family and the families of my close relatives. Nowhere there are less than four children; but when I looked at the next generation, I noticed that this number is nowhere more than two. And on thinking, I realized that along with Hindus, there is some change in this area in the Muslim society as well. Where their older generation used to have eight to ten children, today’s Muslims have come down to four to five. They have also started paying attention to educating their children and cleanliness. Earlier they were satisfied by educating their children in madrasas for four to six years, now when they are capable, they have started sending them to good schools. Although Muslim girls are still rarely seen there; but they have also started coming in large numbers to the schools located in the Muslim colony. Similarly, awareness has also come in the poor section of the society. But I want it to move a little further. Because when you educate a man, you educate a man. When you educate a woman, you educate a generation.
India is a country rich in tradition and cultural values, where women have a prominent place in the society. There is a large population of women in the rural scenario. Unfortunately, during the foreign rule, many evils and distortions arose in the society, which led to oppression of women.
After independence, the respect of women increased in the society, but the pace of their empowerment remained slow for decades. Poverty and illiteracy have been a serious obstacle in the progress of women. Women can be strengthened economically by encouraging them towards business through quality education and skills. Social and financial empowerment of women can be started especially with the help of agro-processing industries, banking services and digitalization.
Indian women are full of energy, vision, lively enthusiasm and commitment and are capable of facing all challenges. In the words of India’s first Nobel Prize winner Rabindranath Tagore, for us women are not only the light of the house, but also the flame of this light. Women have been a source of inspiration for humanity since time immemorial. From Rani Lakshmibai of Jhansi to Savitribai Phule, India’s first female teacher, women have set great examples of change in the society at large.
Our culture is our heritage, we have to preserve it. In the last few years, due to the race of modernity and nuclear families, we are getting away from our culture. But in the meantime, the pleasant aspect is that in this fast paced life of modernity, special work is being done by various social organization to connect the new generation with our traditional culture and to make them aware of the importance of festivals. This is an effort to take our culture and civilization forward along with maintaining our customs.
Before taking the society towards positivity, we have to improve our own conduct. Positive thinking is the biggest strength of the society. At present, negativity is increasing in the society. To stop this, positive people will have to unite and run a campaign. We have to follow the teachings and ideas given by great men. We have to start this from ourselves. At the same time, we have to give up the evils and some bad practices spread in the society. The youth have to be made aware about prevention from drug addiction. Our great men are our heritage. We have to follow the teachings given by the great men. We have to create a society that distributes sweets in our homes on the happiness of others. For this, casteist mentality has to be overcome and social brotherhood has to be strengthened. To create a positive environment in the society, first of all we have to start from ourselves. After this, we have to unite our home, family and our village. Only then will our goal be accomplished. We have to become active by forming an organization of positive people. Our parents have brought us here by keeping a positive thinking. At that time the family environment used to be positive and strong. In the present time, due to single families, the values have diminished. Now there is a need to follow the footsteps of elders and great men. I hope that the curiosity in my mind will definitely be fulfilled.
Write about a random act of kindness you’ve done for someone.
Helping is very important in human life. Helping reveals a person’s humility and his values. Helping gives a person ultimate happiness. When we help someone, we feel happy. Perhaps we do not know that we too may have to take help from someone someday. We do not think that when someone asks us for help and we refuse, how bad he must feel? In life, the process of giving and receiving continues continuously and at many levels. The circle of those who help keeps forming and growing by holding hands from one person to another, from another to the third. When needed, sometimes we get help from those whom we help, and sometimes the hands that help are from others.
One day I was going to the market and I saw a small boy walking barefoot in the sun carrying a bundle weighing 8-10 kg on his head. I stopped him and asked him where he was going barefoot and what was in the bundle. The boy said that his mother was ill and his father was not there. There was some rice in his bundle which he had bought from the market. But that small child was unable to carry the load. That is why his voice became tearful. I put the children in my car and went to drop him home. I saw that his mother was lying on a cot in the hut. On seeing me, his mother got scared thinking that maybe her child had done something wrong. She started looking at her children with wide eyes, as if asking them why this woman had come with them. Then the child told his mother that he was unable to carry the load, so this aunty had helped him. The woman was telling her child to at least give them water. But I made an excuse of urgent work, gave some money to his mother and went away from there. I had helped that child a little. But even today I sometimes meet that child on the road. And he starts smiling as soon as he sees me. Even today, whenever I meet that child, I do not forget to give him some money. His smile helps me forget my thousands of sorrows.
Sometimes we accidentally do such good deeds which we have never even thought of. But do you know that good deeds cannot be done without God’s help.We are able to help someone only when the time comes to repay the debt of our past life. Sometimes we cannot help anyone even if we want to. And sometimes we unknowingly do something that brings a smile on someone’s face. It is said that wise people have two hands. One hand to help themselves and the other to help others. And this wisdom comes when we understand that helping others is also good for us. Not only are the needs of others fulfilled, but there is no shortage for us too. So help others. Not because it is a virtuous act. Not even out of fear that someday you may need the help of others. Help because it is good for you too. Helping is good for your own mental health. The mind gets that happiness and peace which is not available even with medicines and therapy. But never let this pride come to your mind that I helped someone. Rather think that I did not help anyone, God helped me. Because you do not know which birth’s debt you have paid.
How would you describe yourself to someone who can’t see you?
Communication has developed a lot in the world to talk to people sitting far away. There was a time when we used to imagine that if only we could see the photo of the person we are talking to on our mobile. Science has now made this possible. But for those who cannot see, the situation is still the same. Sometimes such a situation arises that we have to tell about ourselves to someone who cannot see us. Something similar happened to me a few days ago when my grandmother wanted to talk to me. She has become very old. Now she can see very little with her eyes but she can hear a little with her ears. So I used such methods to talk to her.
I put the phone on speaker mode. And now I started asking my grandmother about her well being. She also asked about me and I told her that I am absolutely fine. When I saw that she was able to hear me, I made a video call. Now I could see her face clearly. She also tried to look at me and she was very happy to see my face.
My maternal grandmother lived in a village near mine. After a few days, I felt like going to meet her. And one day when I went to meet her, she became so happy that she held my hand in hers. My touch brought tears to her eyes. She held my hand after a long time. That warmth of love told the whole story. The trembling of her old wrinkled hands was making me restless. My maternal grandmother was becoming uncontrollable with happiness after getting the fragrance of my body.I did not need to tell anyone about my condition. Her experienced eyes and mind had read everything, whether I was happy in my world or not.
After that day, I understood that to know and understand someone, one does not need only eyes. If a person wants, he can sense the expressions of the outside world with his inner eyes. because He who cannot see can see everything.
What traditions have you not kept that your parents had?
Everything changes with time but some of those changes are beneficial and some are harmful. Sanatan Dharma is full of traditions. Our ancestors always used to tell us that we should do this and that. Some of those traditions have become a part of our daily life even today. Like getting up in the morning and leaving the bed only after taking the name of God, worshipping God daily and offering Prasad, keeping fasts according to religion, obeying the husband, etc. There are many such things which Indian women are following even today. But there are some traditions which our parents used to follow and we are not able to do.
Touching the feet of elders every morning. In childhood, our parents used to tell us that touching the feet of elders brings blessings. Our school bus used to come but we could not go to school without performing this daily routine. After marriage, when I came to my in-laws’ house, I touched the feet of elders every day for a few days. After that, due to the confusion of life, I gave up this tradition.
Brushing our teeth with Neem: In childhood our grandmothers used to teach us that we should brush our teeth with Neem. Now it is popular only in a few villages to break the bark or stick of Neem and clean the teeth with it. Sometimes teeth were also cleaned by mixing salt in 4 drops of mustard oil. The advantage of doing both these daily rituals was that while it kept the teeth and intestines clean and strong, it had other astrological benefits too. Scientists say that because of strong teeth and gums, your eyes, ears and brain also remain healthy. But today, it has been replaced by toothpaste.
Paying obeisance to the rising sun every day,, I remember in my childhood when my mother used to wake us up for school and she used to say, look the sun has also risen. Get up and first of all pay obeisance to the sun. Mother used to say that when the rays of the sun fall on our body then it brings with it many skin benefits. In Hindu religion, the sun is considered a god. Today’s life is different, staying up late at night and getting up late in the morning has become a routine for today’s generation. Even though we know that this is wrong, we cannot stop ourselves. Late night parties were not a tradition of Hindu religion. In Sanatan Dharma, even eating after sunset is prohibited.
Applying kajal or surma in eyes daily, in childhood our mothers and grandmothers used to apply kajal or surma in our eyes daily. And also a black mark on the forehead. Surma is of two types- one white and the other black. Kajal is made from black surma. Applying surma has been prevalent in Central Asia as well as in India. Both types of surma are basically found in the form of stone. Gems are also made from it and kajal is also made from it. Sometimes, while applying surma cures all the diseases of the eyes, some people also use it for Vashikaran. There are many miraculous benefits of wearing its gem. While applying surma saves a person from the evil eye, his eyes also remain healthy. We still apply kajal but only when we have to get ready to go somewhere.
Applying Vermilion in the parting of hair every day, when I got married my mother had said that daughter apply Vermilion in the parting of hair every day. And when I came to my in-laws house my mother in law also said the same. According to Hindu tradition applying Vermilion in the parting of hair increases the lifespan of the husband. But the scientific reason behind this is that Vermilion keeps our head cool. I followed this tradition for a few years. But now according to the changing fashion I have given up this tradition.
Watering the Peepal tree every morning: In childhood we were taught that we should water the Peepal tree daily. Because the Peepal tree produces the maximum amount of oxygen. While other trees and plants emit carbon dioxide gas at night, the Peepal tree releases a lot of oxygen even at night. This is why the elders have laid special emphasis on its conservation. In olden times, people used to forbid going near the Peepal tree at night. According to them, evil spirits reside in the Peepal tree, while the truth is that due to excess of oxygen, the person feels suffocated. The people of the house near which there is a Peepal tree, remain healthy.
Consumption of Tulsi and Panchamrit, when our mother used to worship, she used to give Tulsi and Panchamrit to all of us children. I also worship God today, but life has become so hectic that I do not have time for all these things. Mother used to say that Tulsi and Panchamrit should be consumed every day, that is why there used to be a Tulsi plant in the courtyard of ancient houses. Although even today it can be found in many people’s homes, but people consume it less. They offer Tulsi to God, while keep its leaves in a copper vessel and after a few hours drink that water and eat the Tulsi leaves. By doing this, there will never be cancer in life nor any other disease. Tulsi plant is an antibiotic medicine. Its consumption increases the immunity of the body, diseases go away and the balance of body fluids remains. Apart from this, if there is a Tulsi plant in the house, then there is no danger of mosquitoes, flies, snakes etc. Even today, whenever there is a cold and cough, I make a decoction of Tulsi and honey and give it to the children.
There are thousands of traditions in Sanatan Dharma which are difficult to maintain in today’s life. There are many traditions which we know are beneficial. But in today’s fast-paced life, these have been left behind. But I can say with confidence that All this has scientific benefits too.Salutations to the eternal tradition.
Days, months and years are passing by like this. Some of these days bring a lot of happiness and sadness for us. But sometimes normal days pass by doing our daily chores. But we should always keep ourselves prepared to deal with all this.
Today was a very normal day for me. Like every day, I woke up in the morning, completed my daily chores and then went to sleep again. Because today is Sunday. Today, husband and children are all at home. We all had our early dinner and watched a good movie. We had our early dinner today because we have brunch on Sundays. And after that, we started playing indoor games. Me and my husband love to play badminton. Also, my children play badminton.It was very hot today so we were not in the mood to go out anywhere. After playing, we all took bath and then sat in front of the TV and had dinner together. And then like every day, I thanked God for today. And now after writing the prompt, I will go to sleep.good night.
Every person is simple, straightforward and good in his own eyes. God definitely sends everyone in this world with some quality.
Similarly, if I talk about myself then I am a very hard working woman. If I decide to do any work then I do not sit in peace until it is completed.
In my childhood I was a simple, shy, timid and weak girl. On the contrary, after marriage I became a strong woman. Time filled me with all the experiences.
I know how to live with love but only if the other person behaves with me with love. I have learnt how to behave with ill mannered people. Even if people speak rudely to me it does not make any difference. But now I do not let myself get hurt.
I am always ready to help everyone but the person who asks me for help without fulfilling any of his selfish motives. Now I have also started to understand who really needs help.
I have never peeped into what people do in their lives. And I don’t like people giving their opinion on my life. I have removed such people from my life. Even though the circle of my fans is very small, I have no regrets.
I am a religious woman and I share my sorrows and pain only with my God. I ask for help and courage from him only and not from humans.
I have complete devotion towards my work and I give priority to my work. I believe that if any person wants to achieve something without hard work then he is lazy.
I love travelling, and coming back home after travelling refreshes my mood. Small joys make me feel very energetic.
Apart from cooking, embroidery, knitting, painting, there are many other things which I am fond of doing and I can do them very well.
I never consider myself perfect. I get angry very quickly and I also do not calm down very quickly. It was not like this in childhood, but perhaps time has made me stubborn.
But I can definitely say that I am a compassionate woman. If I have to give something to a poor or sad person, I am not greedy at all.
In the end I would just like to say that I do not know how to praise myself, nor do I know how to falsely praise others because I hate those who praise in front of others and later pull their legs.I am a human like everyone else but I am different from others.
If you could bring back one dinosaur, which one would it be?
Dinosaurs became extinct 66 million years ago, so we certainly don’t have any dinosaur DNA at this point. But inside every human being there is an animal as dangerous as the dinosaurs, and that is anger.Even today anger is causing havoc in the world. Anger which can turn a human into a monster. Anger which is the biggest destroyer of humans. Just like bringing back dinosaurs means reducing the number of humans, plants and animals. Because dinosaurs have to take all of them for food. Similarly, anger also destroys the humanity of a human being.
If you won two free plane tickets, where would you go?
Everyone likes to travel. So, if they get it for free, then perhaps people can dream big. But even if I get two tickets, first I should see that just going to the place I want to go will not be enough. Will I be able to bear the expenses of staying, food and travelling there? Because wherever we go, we first think about bearing the expenses according to that place. So I think even if I get free tickets, I will have to move ahead after thinking a lot. At present, my savings will allow me to go to Sri Lanka, which is my heartfelt desire. Being a Sanatani, I would like to visit the land where the feet of Sri Rama and Sita had fallen.
Nickname is a loving name after our birth, I think there is hardly any child who does not have a nickname. Many people get rid of their nickname after growing up but for their parents they still remain the same child and are called by the same name. I too have a nickname which is now limited to my mother only. My mother still calls me Kinnu which means orange in hindi. She says that in my childhood my face was very chubby and fair so she suddenly thought of naming me Kinnu. I like the loving name given by my mother.I remember when I used to play hide and seek with her in childhood, she would look for me and say, Where is Mummy’s Kinnu?
Redefinewisdom 